Friday, December 4, 2009

Recipes

The Bag Lady apologizes for being "missing in action", but she's been busy. (and no, it wasn't because she was dodging paparazzi trying to interview her regarding her torrid affair with Tiger.... she's probably one of the few gorgeous women who hasn't had a fling with him. *ahem*)

She has been working, both at her paying job, and on the ranch, and around the house. She has a ton of paperwork to do, and has made scarcely a dent in it so far (where DOES all that crap come from, anyway?)

She did get a start on some of her Christmas baking. She made Eggnog Fudge, which she has never made before, and survived the sugar coma it sent her into.

Warning: do NOT make this fudge if you have young children observing you.

SPARE YOURSELF THE SHAME, THE DEGRADATION, THE HUMILIATION YOU WILL FEEL WHEN YOU AWAKEN FROM THE SUGAR COMA YOU WILL INEVITABLY SLIP INTO IF YOU SO MUCH AS LICK THE SPOON, BECAUSE YOU WILL NOT BE ABLE TO STOP UNTIL THE WHOLE FREAKIN' PAN IS GONE!

And what kind of example is that to set for your children?

She also made Marble Bark. Well, sort of. She was going to make Almond Marble Bark, but didn't have any almonds. Her recipe called for three ingredients: white chocolate, bittersweet chocolate and almonds. Simple, right? She didn't have bittersweet chocolate (well, she did, but it had been hanging around her pantry for so long it had turned grey, so she decided it was best not to use it), and her almonds were wa-a-a-ay at the back of the pantry, but the pecans (which she actually prefers to almonds, if the truth be known) were right up front, so she made up her own recipe. She toasted the pecans, then she melted 5 squares of semi-sweet chocolate (2 minutes on medium in the microwave), into which she dumped a couple handfuls of chopped pecans, then she melted 5 squares of white chocolate, into which she dumped a generous amount of toffee bits. She spooned piles of each mixture onto a piece of tinfoil, then drew a knife through the whole thing to marble the mixture. Refrigerate until firm, then break into pieces.
Yum.

20 comments:

Miz said...

never apologize to us :) we are happy youre out there living and returning with stories.

off to fashion a blindfold out of a bandanna for the child so I can maketh the fudge.

the Bag Lady said...

Miz - your comment cracked me right up! Thanks!

JavaChick said...

Marshmallow creme? Would that be Marshmallow fluff? In any case, all I can say is I'm glad that I have a tendency to reject recipes as soon as I see "marshmallow" in the ingredients (except for rice krispie squares) because otherwise I'm sure I would be following you to sugar coma land. And no, I have no idea why I react that way to marshmallow.

Hilary said...

I've never made marble bark. The best I could get out of it was a little squeak.

RecipeGirl said...

Sounds like you liked the Eggnog Fudge LOL! Glad you enjoyed :)

the Bag Lady said...

JavaChick - yes, marshmallow fluff. And I have a recipe for fruit dip that calls for marshmallow fluff that is to DIE for! And simple as all get out. One jar of marshmallow fluff, one package of cream cheese. Mix together. (I use a stick blender). Serve with assorted cut up fruit. Divine!!!

Hilary - well, obviously, you're not doing it right! LOL

Recipe Girl - the fudge is wonderful! I am taking it to work with me today because I'm afraid to keep it in the house! :) Thanks for posting the recipe, and thanks for stopping by here and commenting!

Leah J. Utas said...

Oh, I soooo want that Bark.

Geosomin said...

eggnog and fudge together?

My ass and I heartily thank you.
Yum....

I'll have them along with my mum-in-law's white chocolate covered pretzels that she makes every year. Mmmm....sugar coma....

Sagan said...

I'm getting into a sugar coma just reading the ingredients for the eggnog fudge. I regularly make these raw brownies made from dates, cocoa powder, and peanut butter, and I pretty much always eat the entire thing in one sitting (tehehe). Mmmmm sweet stuff.

That maple bark stuff sounds good! You can keep the pecans though. I'll take your portion of almonds ;)

Crabby McSlacker said...

If not for my self-diagnosed plantar fasciitis I would walk all the way to Canada to get some of that bark. Holy cow that sounds delicious. (And I'd need to walk a couple thousand miles to undo the calories I'd consume. Sounds heavenly).

Aleta said...

Ohhh, that sounds sinful!

Reb said...

Oh My Heavenly Sugar Coma! Are you sending a care package my way?

messymimi said...

Chocolate that has that gray/white film on it is still good, actually. I remember reading about what causes that, many years ago, but I can't remember the details. The conclusion was that it is still safe to eat, so I use it if it happens, but usually chocolate doesn't last around here long enough.

The easiest candies in the world are made of a bag of semisweet chocolate chips melted with 3 tablespoons of butter, and mix in pecans. Pour into an 8x8 pan lined with buttered foil to make it easier to get it of the pan. Set it in the fridge and when it starts to set, take the foil out, lay flat, cut, and put back in the fridge to harden. Everyone loves it, and I've used walnuts, peanuts, almonds, cashews, raisins, and even just the chocolate and butter.

I can't wait to try your recipe. too!

Charlotte said...

First someone else sends me a recipe for eggnog poundcake and now eggnog fudge? I think this is the universe telling me there is 'nog in my future:) Thanks for the recipes! (And for the Tiger Woods comment - you crack me up!)

solarity said...

Hitherto I have been safe from almond bark because I don't like almonds. Now...it's all your fault.

I'm baking spice cookies and seven-layer cookies tonight, to add to last night's chocolate chip cookies, for the house tour tomorrow. Have I cleaned yet? Not.

Mary Anne in Kentucky

POD said...

Eggnog fudge!?!

kcinnova said...

Bittersweet chocolate, check. Almonds, check. Hmmmm.... what can I substitute for the white chocolate??
Off to click on that egg nog fudge recipe. I'm afraid to look, but I can't help myself. I might be an addict...

And Hilary just made me LOL!!

Amy Mullis said...

Well, if Tiger's not going to ask you to escort him around town, at least he could give you a high-dollar job with lots of time off!

Gena said...

Oh, that sounds good. I really need to learn how to make candies. It's the one thing I haven't tried, and I love me some peppermint bark.

the Bag Lady said...

Thanks, everyone, for your comments!

I'll be adding a few things to my list of holiday baking now! (Chocolate covered pretzels.... peppermint bark... yum!!)